Executive Vice President, Home Operations

Top 5 Signs I Might Be Pregnant

So I am writing this all down as I go through it, and holding on to it for future publication.

5.  I am about a week late and have peed on a stick twice, two days apart and gotten two negatives.  So clearly I am convinced I am pregnant.  My husband says to just wait and be patient, surely Aunt Flo will come to visit. But I’m all like “That crazy lady is NEVER late.”

4.  On more than one occasion this week, I have felt the urge to eat, and then hated every possible option.  This is not a normal reaction.   Normally my only hesitation is because I LOVE every option and I have to convince myself to just pick one, or two, things to enjoy.

3.When people ask me how life is going I say Amazing! Both my associates sleep all night long and are now potty trained. Even little Associate A stays dry all night!  And then the person I am speaking to, every time without fail, immediately says, “Oh that means its time to have another baby!”  What ?!?!   Why would you people put that karma on me.  I am well rested for the first time in 4 years.

2. I have a draft blog post I recently started titled “Not Right Now” about how I had finally come to terms with telling people who ask if we are going to have more kids (BECAUSE PEOPLE ASK ME ALL THE TIME)  maybe we won’t have another baby, or at least not right now.   So clearly as soon as I write it, the opposite will happen.

1. We cleaned under our bed last week (see #3 why I am well rested and productive) and I found my old black dance pants from college.  Not only do they fit, but I think they might look better today than they did 15 years ago.  The CEO noticed yesterday that I had worn them around the house every day this week.  Of course!  I’ve worked damn hard to get back to get my pre-kid body back, and I’m going to enjoy it πŸ™‚

But clearly one can not flaunt such a hot bod and then be surprised when karma wants to smack you back up 40lbs and add a few more stretch marks.

The CEO and I are totally open to more children and will love any and all that the good Lord blesses us with. So please don’t read this like I am hoping I am not pregnant.  On any given day I change my mind 500 times if it would be super perfect time or a terrible time to add a new Associate to the mix.

I guess that is why it is best to just put my faith in the Lord and know that all things happen according to His plan, and His time.  Not mine.  So why should I worry either way?

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