EVPHO

Executive Vice President, Home Operations

Respect The Safe Word

The Associates are growing up and have discovered, as all brothers do, the joys of wrestling and roughhousing.  Things are a little nuts around here these days.  At any given moment there are squeals of laughter followed by sharp cries of pain.  No one has had to be taken to the ER yet, but our boo boo buddy is seeing a little more action than usual.  It is only a matter of time really.

Associates Wrestling

Associates Wrestling

So in light of their new found love of indoor tackling and body-slamming on the couch, we’ve had to amend a few house rules.

  1. Use inside voices….. Amended to “Use inside voices when the CEO is working from home.”  All other times you can assume it is loud as heck up in here.
  2. Be kind to each other…. Amended to “Mutual aggression is fun, but it is not ok to sucker punch.”
  3. Listen to your mother… Amended to “Respect the referee and do not attack her.”  They still ignore this rule.
  4. Use your words…. Amended to “Respect the safe word.  Only use it if you are in real pain.  Stop hurting your brother immediately if he says it.”
  5. Help clean up your messes….. Amended to “Don’t destroy things.  If you destroy a room, help clean up the mess.  If you break a thing, well, we will deal with that on a case by case situation.”
  6. No jumping on the couch…. Amended to “No couch olympics when company is over.”

That should cover us for now.  As long as they are playing together, having fun and leaving me out of it, I honestly don’t care what they do to each other.  I just want to pee alone.

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